December 2017

Hopefully we are all loving the warmth this summer is already showing us. I find when it's warm I just feel better, do you? I'm sitting outside right now looking at nature and listening to the chatter of the birds. It seems by the lushness of the plants and the sounds coming from the trees, nature too revels in the power of a lovely warm day.

Do you practice gratitude when you take a moment to sit and reflect on your day? What do you see around you and moments of joy that can be experienced by the everyday? It's so easy to get caught up in the stress of our day, whether it's in our jobs, our kids or our relationship, especially at this time of year. I know in my head I often blow anything negative up until they or I am the worst person in the world. When I sit back and reflect honestly about many of these I realise this is just the story I am telling myself. And this story distorts the more I focus on my limiting beliefs.

Those of you who have been on a retreat will know what I mean by limiting beliefs but for those of you who haven't, I will explain what I mean. Limiting beliefs is the negative self talk we have. About ourselves, our situation and the people around us. This negative self talk is rarely factual or truthful; rather an accumulation of stuff you believe about yourself. For some of us, that voice that pesters us can become deafening and so constant that we start believing it to the point that we have very little self-belief or confidence left. I've spent most of my life believing the lies I told myself. I never had any real self-belief and what others saw was very much a facade.

I never wanted to live like this yet I didn't know how to change my thought patterns. It took a long time, therapy and being vulnerable with myself in order to make change. One amazing technique I learnt at the retreat is to journal my thoughts and write down everything I was feeling and believing. I then re-read it later and often by then I have calmed down and am able to look at what I've written objectively. At times I've even laughed at my childish tantrum that has unfolded on paper. Suddenly the story loses its power. And I'm able to let it go.

So do you journal? Have you thought about it but don't know what to write. It's therapeutic in itself and remember to end in a positive. What are you grateful for? Just for today? Write them down or go outside and say them out loud perhaps. And ask yourself, in this moment, am I ok? And maybe, just maybe, you'll notice a change in mindset. Even just for today. Then repeat it again tomorrow.